Can You Keep A Secret?
by Life-is-frustrating
Summary: James discovers Lily's deepest, darkest and vainest secret.


Author/ Rewriter: This story is actually based on the anime series "Kare Kano" also known as "His and Her Circumstances." I copied A LOT of parts in this story from the actual series. I just wanted to share the story with you guys. Also I will be creating the ending of this story since its creator didn't finish the series. Hope you enjoy this. I added a few scenes though. Please review!

Summary: James finds out about Lily's most deepest, darkest and vainest secret. Will James expose her destroy Lily's image or use it to black mail her?

Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling. It's not mine and the plot belongs to the creator of His and Her Circumstances.

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Chapter 1- Her circumstances

I am Lily Evans and how do people see me?

"Lily is really amazing!" Said one of the girls sitting beside me.

"Smart, cute and good personality!" The public approves.

"I really admire her! Even the professors listen to her." The others nod in approval.

"She's really great!" Again others approve.

"She has no faults." Yeah.

Hehhehehehhh… So in the end this is how people see me, the object of admiration. But ever since I came to this school I have always been irritated. Why?

"Both our prefects are great!" There you go. My co-prefect. This is the second time I would be working with him as a prefect and most likely next year too as head boy-girl. Oh so perfect JAMES POTTER. I already hated him since first year.

You want to know a secret?

Everything these people see me as, is just a show. My good personality is a lie. In reality I just want to stand out from the other people. I just want to be admired, to be treated like someone special.

Ever since I was I child I've been pretending to be perfect just to hear those sweet words of praises. I created an image that every person would admire. I learned the violin and the piano when I was a little girl just to impress my relatives. I study hard to be respected and be looked up by students; sometimes I even study all-night if there's a quiz or exam the next day. I act like a proper lady to be liked and be complimented. I read loads of fashion magazines just to look presentable to other people. I want to be number one! I am the king of VANITY. My vainness is already a part of me. Truth to be told, I'm actually lazy, spoiled and stubborn at home.

I've always been number one in the muggle schools I've attended before Hogwarts. My preschool, my grades school… I was number one in all of it. I was even the student council president before.

But now James Potter is here. He's in the way of my plans and I. He has beaten me in almost all my subjects. My hatred for him started even before I knew him.

Flashback

It was in my first year during the train ride to Hogwarts and the girls that I was with were talking about him. During my first year all I can hear was…

"James is amazing"

"He's so smart…"

"So nice…"

"So cute"

"So… Perfect!"

James got all the attention.

Soon the year was ending and I remain unknown. But then my opportunity to make my debut came. The teachers announced that the person who will get the highest score in the exam would represent their batch. This was my chance. I thought if I represented my batch everyone would know of my existence. I thought it would be my chance to upstage this James Potter, the depressing geek they've been talking about all year. I studied so hard to get the highest score. I was so confident that I already made a speech. But I lost by a point to James Potter. He represented the batch. Potter was the talk of the school. James Potter, first year mister perfect. I have never been so humiliated in my whole life.

My humiliation went on until fifth year.

End of flash back

And now I have to redeem myself and make everyone realize how great I am. I have two more years to prove myself.

Those words of praises are the source of my life energy. I can't live without them.

That James Potter! Just because he's nice and popular with the girls doesn't mean he can upstage me. He's even the son of these famous aurors, which means they're really rich. He really pisses me off. I'll never let him have the number one spot again. I'll teach that rich boy how harsh life can be!

The sorting just finished and my eyes landed on mister perfect. I get angry just by looking at him. What an annoying little git.

The next morning, I got ready for class, ate at the great hall and walked to my first class. I like arriving first in class; it's actually become a habit. I opened the door.

"Good morning Lily." Gag me its Potter.

"Oh, Good morning James." I walked towards him.

"You're always early." Potter said.

"Not at all, look at you." Man, first thing in the morning and I just had to run into this guy I didn't want to see. But my impregnable mask won't crumble at a thing like this.

"I had to practice with my teammates this morning so…"

"Ah, you're our new quidditch captain aren't you? Practice seems hard" I don't play quidditch if you're wondering.

"Yeah… We have to start practice 6 in the morning everyday then up to 8 after dismissal." They should've made it up to 12 so you'd be too tired to study and I'll have the top spot.

"Really? That much? But still, you keep up with your studies, so you must work hard. You're amazing." I smiled but I really wanted to gag.

"Not really…" He blushed. I wonder what he's so embarrassed about? "You're smart and dependable yourself. You're really skilled. You made me realize that there are amazing people like you in this school and it really showed me how big this world is and how small a world I used to lived in."

I pretend to be modest. "Not at all. I'm only…" Pretending, I wanted to say but I stopped and just smiled and so did he. Foolish Potter. This nice girl you see will soon bring you down.

So then classes started and we had to perform a spell in charms. My classmates seemed to have problems with it but I didn't and so did Potter.

"Ahhh… James, show me how to do it." James showed her how and the rest of the class started to crowd in on him.

"James, show us too."

"Why don't we put our desk together and try it out."

"Yeah! That's a good idea!" and I am left alone in the corner with my table.

Then during lunch break and few female housemates asked me for a few pointers for our potions class. When Potter came in, I was abandoned. Traitors. They started cheering… "James you're so cool." And "We'll cheer for you on quidditch season."

After that, during history of magic the whole class was impressed by his 'knowledge' in the subject. I knew all of that too. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have any problem with being noticed. Damn Potter! I really hate him. It's so cold to be buried as an average person. I want to be noticed, acknowledged and praised by everyone. Just watch Potter I'm going to bury you alive!

It's the last subject and I'm really sleepy since I pulled an all-nighter advance study session with myself last night to beat him. I'm listening to our teacher's long boring bullshit lecture. I never really liked Divination especially since our professor is really dopey. Her voice is really…dra- yawn-gging…

My head drooped.

I immediately sat straighter. That was close. I should stay awake. This is what Potter want. He wants me to lose concentration. I put my quill between my lips and played with it a bit to wake me up but I'm really sleepy maybe I could rest my eyes for a few moments.

My head drooped lower.

When my quill touched my desk I immediately opened my eyes really wide. Oh my… I looked around to see if anyone saw me dozing off. My image… my…

I am staring straight at Potter's dark blue irritating eyes. Potter saw me.

After class Potter walked up to me and told me what I did was dangerous.

"Huh?" dangerous? Dozing off is dangerous?

"You shouldn't put quills in your mouth unless they're sugar quills of course." I feel my face flush red.

"Yeah, uh… yes, you're right."

Damn Potter! He really pisses me off! I will definitely, definitely, definitely defeat him!

Weeks after weeks I really think I'm doing great with my academics even though we have a lot of meetings. I actually just came from a meeting about the upcoming Christmas ball and now I'm walking along a corridor beside Potter.

"This school has a lot of meetings doesn't it?" James commented trying to start a conversation since we've been walking in complete silence. "I didn't think it would be so much work. Last Year wasn't too busy."

"Yeah." Time to impress. "But that shows how much we're entrusted with the self-governing of us students. We should think of it as work worth doing." Heheh…

"You're really mature Lily." Shaddup.

"Oh that's right, Lily? What kind of books do you read?"

"Oh… books? I like classics. I've been borrowing the works of Shakespeare and Jane Austen from the library lately." Actually I don't. It's just one of my acts. "But the library doesn't seem to have this book I'm looking for 'A midsummer nights dream' It's the only one I haven't read." It's true I read all of Shakespeare's works so that I if someone actually ask me about it I can answer the question.

"Really? I think have that one at home. If you want I can lend it to you. My parents are really fans of muggle literatures. I can ask our helpers to owl it to me. Exams are near so maybe I'll give it to you after." Exams are tomorrow. He smiles. I hate him.

"Really? Thank you." He's really a rich boy isn't he? Books cost a lot now these days and they could even afford helpers.

Later that day I was heading back to my room when someone called out to me "Lily!" I was really annoyed. James he caught up with me. "Heading back?"

"Yeah, you don't have quidditch practice today?" I asked nicely although I was annoyed.

"We wont have practice this week since it's already exam week. Do you mind if walk with you?"

"No not at all." Yes I do mind! I wish you would just trip and fall face flat on the floor.

We finally reached the common room. "Well good luck in studying" I said and climbed the stairs to the girl's dormitory then I got ready for an all-nighter.

I studied like a something has possessed me. I studied like there was no tomorrow. I study in the morning at the classroom; I studied at the library during lunch and at the common room after classes. I couldn't let Potter get the number one spot again and finally the exams were over and it's the day of the Christmas ball and the day when the top twenty students of each batch is posted at the common room's bulletin board.

After waking up, I got changed and went down to the common room. I tried to walk as calmly as possible. When I entered the common room people were crowding around the board but as I walked closer the noise became louder.

"Wow! Ms. Evans, you're really amazing!" One person said to me. They even gave way for me to see the board.

"Congratulations!"

"You've beaten James!"

"I knew James is amazing but you're great too. I never knew until know."

"You're really something Evans."

I did it! It's been so long since I've heard pealing of admiration. It feels so good. Everyone was saying that I'm amazing. I've finally beaten James!

"Ah! Lily." So you've come Potter but this isn't your world anymore. Starting from now on you'll be enveloped in a dismay feeling. You'll burn in the feelings of humiliation and instead of me; you'll see the same hell that I tasted and when you're hopeless and at that time I'll speak words filled with sympathy and pity 'I wish you luck next time Potter.' Come! Show me your face full of defeat and humiliation!

"You really are amazing after all." What?

Wait a minute. What's with that reaction? He smiled and said I was amazing! I wasn't expecting this. I thought all I had to do was surpass James in order to win… What is this? I won but I'm not happy. Or rather I alone was obsessing about grades and appearance… and Potter never cared about those things to begin with!

People, even without the ulterior motive of wanting to win, acknowledged him. That's why he's the real thing!

And here I am acting like a good person and deceiving everyone.

Isn't this called hypocrisy?

I couldn't even remember when I started to pretend. Now that I think of it I'm such a popularity freak. I've been trying to be someone I'm not and all I've got myself was exhaustion. Trying to become a creature that was not me was an idiotic thing to do. Idiot! Idiot! I am such and idiot!

I'm ashamed of myself for being so selfish, insensitive and vain. Compared to James, I'm nothing but a selfish brat who cares so much for her image.

I'm such a loser.

The later on that day I felt so depressed and I didn't even want to go to the ball later. But I can't stay in bed. What would my dorm mates think? I know! I can just stay at the old room by the dungeons for a while. I discovered it on my third year. There's an old piano there. I can play the piano to pass time. When I reached the room, I briefly chatted with the young girl at the portrait. Then I asked her if I could go in for a while.

"Sure. It's been a long time since you last played the piano here. It's been really quiet, you should come by more often Lily." I nodded with a smile and she let me in.

I pulled the curtains to the side and opened the window to let some light and air in. I sat on the piano's chair and pulled up its cover. I lightly traced its keys and started playing my favorite piece. The piece my grandfather has composed for me. After the song I was startled when someone applauded. I turned to see who it was.

"You really surprise me Lily. You're smart and talented. Impressive." I blushed.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Oh I'm sorry. I was walking by and heard the music. I asked the portrait if she could let me in."

"Oh… uh…I should get ready for the ball." I stood up and walked pass him. "We should head back." I kept on avoiding his gaze, I feel really bad about thinking bad things about him. "Wait, Lily," He grabbed my arm as I passed him. "I'm in love with you."

My heart almost stopped beating.

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Author here. Did you like it? Tell me if you think it totally sucks or if it's too boring. Tell me if my English is bad or if the story is actually good. Please please review if you liked the story or not. Please review. I really don't mind flames. :p

The next chapter would be: **The deepest, darkest, vainest secret** (James is about to discover Lily's secret.)


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